I got Landry's invitations yesterday. I was pretty excited - I was leaving the house for my interview and there they were next to the front door. As soon as I got home I started addressing them, and then I put them in the mail YAY! I only sent out 25 invitations this year...mostly to close friends and family - and I invited some people through facebook, but it seems that it will be a smaller party. I told JR that it didn't matter to me how many people showed up as long as her family was there. Unfortunately, that doesn't seem to be the case. Most of JR's family is still trying to decide whether or not to come. I am pretty baffled by it....I know JR is hurt but what can we do? I am not going to try and persuade or force anyone to come. If they do, its because they want to be here to celebrate what I feel is an incredibly special day. Of course, its my child, so of course I feel that way...but really I think that about everyones first birthday. My friend had her child's first birthday a few months ago, and I was unable to make it for a few reasons, JR had to work, I didn't have the money for a hotel, Logan and I got sick, and even if none of this happened, I DID NOT want to handle two kids by myself in a car for 4 hours there and back. But I was heartbroken that I didn't go. I literally ached to be there...and she isn't even family...close, but not family. Now to be fair, one of JR's sisters has a son in little league football...he is 12 so, I am sure that he would not want to miss a game to come to his one year old cousin's birthday party. I understand that...he's 12 - I would feel the same way. JR's brother has a son who is playing t-ball - this I feel differently about...he is 4, he can miss one stinking game - it wont bother him at all...this doesn't make sense to me that they would not come because he has a t-ball game. His other sister, says it's still too early to tell...what does that mean? Are you waiting to see if something better comes along. His mom, says - well I may be working! WTF! If you know about your granddaughter's birthday party a month in advance, wouldn't you take off work for that day??? I mean you have four grandkids and you never see any of them - you didn't go to Tyler's party for the last 3 years, last year you stopped by Davin's party long enough to tell him happy birthday then you left because you had a wine party to go to, you didn't go to his party this year because you went on a cruise, you didn't go to Logan's first birthday, you stopped by on the second one...and you didn't even call on the third...so why am I surprised??? I dont know but it is shocking to me! Seriously insane that your priorities are so fucked up. The thing that I think will sting the most....JR's cousin had a baby a 2 or 3 days before Landry was born and it just so happens that they are having Aubrey's birthday on the same day. I think it would be very hurtful if they went to Aubrey's party and not Landry's. Anyway, JR is completely torn up about it, he says that if they dont show up - he's done with them. Although, I am furious as well, I have to be the voice of reason and say...babe you can't cut yourself off from them, it's their choice to come or not we can't force it on them...I know he is hurt...It would break my heart if were my parents or my sisters...which is wierd, because if Vanessa my little sister doesn't come it wouldnt really bother me because I know she is in college and is really busy - plus she is working for the news station at Sam Houston and at a daycare and taking 18 hours...but she says she took off and that she will make it one way or another...anyway, it's still two weeks away so I guess we will see!
Also, I KNOW that I am being a little over-sensative about this...i mean in the grand scheme of things it is just a birthday party...but I just can't wrap my head around his family not being there...what do you guys think? Am I being crazy..are JR and I being overly sensative...or would you be upset too?
2 comments:
Hey! No worries about not making it to Aiden's party. Traveling alone with just one kid sounds stressful enough - let alone two! I'm just excited that we get to come see you guys for Landry's birthday.
Sorry JR's family is being a bummer. Seems like family are usually the ones that hurt you the most. Then again, it may hurt the most because they are the ones you love the most. Heck, my dad made it to Aiden's 1st bday party and he lives in Illinois!!
See you in a couple weeks!
I guess now you see why I had to limit who can read my blog...It is a really difficult situation. JR is really affected by this. He is saying that if his family doesn't show up then he is cutting himself out of their lives..no Christmas visits - nothing - he wants nothing to do with them. He says he is tired of being there for all of his family and that he never asks them for anything, but supports them in everything and they can't even be bothered to show up to their neice's/granddaughter's first birthday. I understand where he is coming from...it hurts my feelings too - but I am trying to encourage him to not take such drastic measures. He says he is just going to leave it alone and wait and see, but then he calls his mom, his brother and his sister yesterday to see if they are coming - so obviously he is really hurting. He has never said anything to them out loud, but every once in a while he will make a comment about his mom wasn't at our wedding. I dont really know what to do for him, so I just support him whatever way I can. I just dont like seeing him hurt...and instead of really saying that he is hurt it just comes out as anger.
I am excited to see you guys in a couple of weeks as well...I thought about sending Aiden's gift but when you said you guys would be able to make it I decided to keep it so that he could have something to open as well! LOL
I have thought about getting Logan something little so that he has something to open - but I figure he can just help Landry!
He brought it up yesterday after he called his family that they can make the drive and use our house, our river floats, and our hospitality for a fun weekend get-away 3-4 times this summer but when it comes to something important - they can't be bothered to come. Again - he is angry, I am trying to tell him that cutting yourself off from Family will hurt you probably MORE than it will hurt them...but oh well! I just hate that his family always seems to bring about drama.
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