untitled

How can you be doing pretty much nothing and still be stressed out. I decided yesterday that I was going to try to relax more. I even took an hour nap yesterday. I basically did nothing all day....and yet somehow my stress levels are still through the roof. JR is on his way home, he decided to keep Logan here and not go to the appointment with me, which is fine, although I really wanted him there. I woke up this morning at 5:15 having some VERY uncomfortable contractions, which continued throughout the morning until I finally got out of bed. I know that they are just Braxton Hicks contractions but they still suck. I am very glad to have an appointment with the doctor today because I feel like something isn't right...its probably just a reaction to the contractions - I never had or at least never felt them when I was pregnant with Logan, so this is a new thing for me, and to tell you the truth, it is kinda scary! Also, I am sad to admit that this will be the third consecutive month that I have gained 6 or more pounds in a months time....I am trying not to get too stressed about my weight, but seriously - it is irritating me! I am also irritated that my appointment isn't until 3:45, which means I wont be getting weighed until around 4:00 which sucks because I weigh a good 2-3 pounds more in the afternoon than I do in the morning. My goal was to stay under 175 for my pregnancy and I just dont think its going to happen which is dissapointing. I guess I will reevaluate my goal when I get home from the doctor. It just sucks, I weighed 16 pounds less when I got pregnant this time than what I weighed when I got pregnant with Logan...and somehow I am going to have the same ending number!!!!!! Ughhhh.....As long as its under 190----OMG! I seriously can't imagine weighing 190 pounds. I was at 189 when they weighed me right before my c-section with Logan. AHHHHH! Holy Crap! I seriously need to stop thinking about weight. Maybe I should start turning the opposite direction when they weigh me, and just not even look - yeah right, I think not knowing will drive me even crazier. JR says my OCD has really picked up in the last month, which I am starting to think that maybe he isn't joking - and maybe that is what is making me so stressed....the constant need for something to be done, and be done a certain way..... Oh thank goodness I only have 12 more weeks...holy crap, I think that is just long enough for someone to truly go nuts! Ha