Over the last few weeks I have had some crazy, funny, embarrassing, irritating conversations...
BRUSHING LANDRY'S HAIR -
Me - Landry sit still.
Landry - Ouch. That hurts. Ouch
Me - If you'll sit still it wont hurt so much.
Landry - (growl noise) You're pissing me off!
Me - What did you just say?
Landry - I said you're pissing me off!
Me - Umm...Landry, we don't say those words..those are big people words.
JR - Wonder where she heard that?
Me - (giving JR the evil eye) I know, I know! (growl noise)
Landry - Am I pretty now?
Me - (chuckle) Yes, you are so pretty!
ps...she hasn't said piss since then...and it was a few weeks ago! PHEW!
CHRISTMAS TALK -
Me - Logan what do you want for Christmas this year?
Logan - I want 3 things.
Me - Okay, what 3 things?
Logan - I want a 3D DS, New Super Mario Bros. 2, and a red Toad. (not a real toad but he wants a plush Toad, a character from Super Mario).
Me - Okay, well we will have to write a letter to Santa.
Logan - Last Christmas, Santa brought me a sword that has two pieces, some toy story cups, Mario Kart 7, and an Umi Zoomi game.
Me - WOW! you're right...I can't believe you remember last Christmas!
Logan - Landry wants 3 thinigs too. (It's hard to keep up with Logan sometimes because he goes back and forth between thoughts and ideas in his head!)
Me - Okay, what does Landry want?
Logan - She want's a DSi, Mario v. Donkey Kong, and a puppy game.
Me - hmmmm...well, maybe instead of Mario v. Donkey Kong she can pick a girly game, like a princess game, or a Dora game.
Logan - Yeah, she can get the Princess Peach game! It's where Peach has to save baby Mario and Luigi!
Me - (sigh!)
TRYING TO UNDERSTAND THE TERM "DEAD WEIGHT" AND COMING TO TERMS WITH YET ANOTHER LIE MY DAD TOLD ME GROWING UP!
Last night both kids fell asleep on the couch, so I carried them to their beds....
Me: (breathing really heavy after getting Logan upstairs) God! He is heavy! I'm a little disturbed that he is so hard to carry.
JR: Why is that disturbing? He's half you're size.
Me: Well, I know but you're supposed to be able to carry twice your body weight, and Logan is only a little less than half my weight.
JR: Why would you be able to carry twice you're body weight?
Me: I don't know, it's a fact.
JR: (Shaking his head) Where did you come up with that?
ME: My dad used to tall me that all the time. When I was in agg, my dad would always make me carry the 50 lb. feed back all the way from the truck to the pig barn. I would always have to stop, like ten times, because it was so far, and he would get onto me saying that I was supposed to be able to lift twice ymy body weight.
JR: How much did you weigh at the time?
Me: 75-80 pounds
JR: Sara, you're dad just didn't want to carry the feed bag. (still giving me the strange look as if I am out of my mind.)
Me: Great! So yet another thing my dad lied about! Just like when he told us he took the animals out to the pasture so they had more room to run and play. ( I only recently found out that this meant the animal had died...stupid me, I really thought they went out to a pasture!)
Me: I wonder what dead weight is?
JR: What?
Me: I mean, I know what it is...I mean, carrying Logan up the stairs while he's asleep is different than carrying him when he's awake, but I don't really understand why. I mean, he weighs 47 pounds, whether he's awake or asleep, so why is it different.
JR: (He's giving me the look)
Me: Let me ask you this...If you have a 10 pound bag of Oatmeal and a 10 pound block of concrete, does the concrete weigh more?
JR: WHAT? NO, they weigh the same...10 pounds.
Me: So what makes the concret SEEM heavier? Is it the mass?
JR: What are you talking about? They are both 10 pounds they are equal in weight.
Me: so maybe it's the density?
JR: Do you know what density is?
Me: mmmm...no, I don't really remember.
JR: Density is mass divided volume.
Me: That explains nothing.
JR: It explains that you should NEVER teach our children ANYTHING to do with math or science.
Me: Maybe its because of the distribution? (Now I am basically talking to myself) No, That can't be right because I can hold him in the exact same position but he still feel heavier when he's asleep.
JR: (sigh) What are you trying to figure out? (sigh)
Me: I want to know why Logan weighs more when he's asleep than when he's awake, except that I know he doesn't ACTUALLY weigh more it just seems like it, so it has to be "dead weight"? But I don't know what the definition of "dead weight" is.
JR: (He gives me the "You're out of your mind" look) When you hold Logan when he is awake He is able to hold some of his own weight because he is holding his own head up or he wraps his arms or legs around you, so the weight is dristributed between your arms and legs and back, but when he is asleep, wh isn't controlling any of his muscles so most of his weight goes to your arms and back, so he feels heavier.
Me: That makes sense.
JR (Shakes his head) That is going on facebook!
2 comments:
Haha! You guys are funny. Aiden has copied cuss words and we tell him the same thing. It really seems to work. He doesn't repeat them. I like that method.
My dad used to make up things to tell me all the time. Now I know they were mostly to get me to stop doing something, but I believed everything he said! I don't plan to ever lie to my kids. I may omit some truths for their sake, but that's as far as I plan to go!
Yeah, it has worked for us. We don't laugh, or yell, or make a big deal over it. We just tell them it's not okay. It seems to work for us.
I agree about the lying to your kids thing, I will most likely omit plenty of truths, but I would really rather not lie to them. My dad never lied about anything important. Seriously, telling someone they should be able to lift twice their body weight really isn't a huge deal...I am more upset with the fact that I have believed it for nearly 20 years! LOL I guess that's kind of the point though...you never know what your kids will take away from you, or which comments will stick with them as they grow older, so you have to be careful what you say!
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